Shannon Kopp was 16 when she decided to try going on her first diet. But what first began as a healthy, new relationship with food quickly spiraled into an obsession of how much she could take out of her diet.
As Kopp’s family life began to fall apart – her father was gone, and her mother and sister were arguing – she turned to bingeing and purging as a form of comfort. Overeating gave her a level of comfort in the midst of chaos, and vomiting it back up allowed her to assuage her guilt.
Kopp kept this up for six months before her sister intervened and yelled at her.
For the next seven years, Kopp struggled to get her eating disorder under control. She tried various methods of rehab – she saw a therapist, tried yoga, went to church, moved to a new town, admitted herself to an official treatment center. None of it worked.
When Kopp turned 24, she managed to find brief solace at her treatment center; the horses that were there as part of the rehab center services gave her an outlet from her roiling emotions and allowed her to find peace.
Kopp’s insurance dropped out not long after she joined the center. Because she wasn’t severely underweight, her insurance policy didn’t want to support the cost of her being there.
Kopp was disappointed, but her interactions with the horses had given her much of the insight she needed to continue recovering. She needed animal interaction, and she needed it fast.
Leaving the treatment center had caused Kopp to relapse for about six months, until her boyfriend threatened to leave her – not to end their relationship, but because he simply couldn’t live in the same space as her anymore.
This was the wakeup call Kopp needed.
She found a job at the San Diego Humane Society and threw herself into working with the shelter dogs there, using their warm, comforting bodies as anchors and solace. Every day, knowing that these dogs needed her help to survive and find new, loving homes was enough to get Kopp out of bed and functioning.
By the time Kopp was 28, she’d seen so many dogs “overcome unthinkable tragedies…some had this innate resilience.” From watching these dogs conquer their own struggles, Kopp realized what she had to do to save her own life.
It’s now been seven years since Kopp last binged and purged. She knows she still has challenges to overcome, and that she will always have to be watchful of her behavior to make sure she doesn’t slip again, but she is now stronger and has learned how and when to ask for help.
